 Author's note: The following short story first appeared on my blog on March 19, 2021. Over three years later, it is still remarkably relevant, perhaps more appropriate now than then. Brynlee pulled her thong up to fully expose the new marijuana leaf tattoo riding high on her plump, white right cheek. She was delighted TikTok was working again (it had been off-and-on for a few days for unknown reasons) though she was moderately distressed the comments feed still wasn’t active. ‘Weah muh boiz? Weah beo-chez? Thot bee hawt!’ she slurred as she began to twerk for the camera. ‘Yaw git high why I shake dis booty, shake dis booty, shake diss booooo-tay!’
The noise from the living room really bothered her—almost as much as the loss of instant gratification from her ten thousand loyal followers. ‘Turn dat sheeit dow!’ she screamed. ‘Dat bee dee nooz?’ Suddenly, Marqueena, the seven-year-old daughter she’d had with Darnell, a man she barely remembered, stormed into the kitchen. Sober eyes would have detected the fear and distress on the cute little face, half ivory, half ebony. ‘Which ship is daddy on?!’ the little girl asked with a shout. ‘Gah! Gurl, waay,’ the attention whore exclaimed as she tapped off her phone. ‘Wuh? Why? He on dat Ray-gan, da airpane sheep.’ With an ear-splitting scream, the child crumpled to the floor in a sobbing heap. Between wails, she bleated, ‘Daddy! Daddy!’ Her wasted, worthless mother stepped over her writhing body and ventured to the doorway. From there, she witnessed something on the 80-inch screen that almost drove the booze and drugs from her underpowered mind. She looked just in time to see the third playing of the first hypersonic anti-ship missile as it plowed into the starboard side of CVN-76. Four more bright flashes followed in rapid succession. Within minutes, over one hundred thousand tons of steel, billions of dollars, and six thousand men—Darnell included—sank to the ocean floor. While little Marqueena rolled and cried, pounding the linoleum with her fists, Brynlee stupidly muttered, ‘Day-um. Muh check…’ The horrific martial scenes on the television were replaced by a stunned Tucker Carlson. With great effort, he spoke again, ‘And, that was Sunday night. Three days ago. They’ve been lying for three days, lying as if nothing was wrong. Well, it is. It’s worse than wrong, it’s unbelievable. It’s terminal. ‘It took Russian and European reporting, that they tried to block, to break the truth openly. For three days, President Harris, or Pelosi, or whoever the hell is supposed to be running this failed nation has been lying to us. A training exercise? Retaliatory strikes. Mission accomplished? Your sailor will contact you when routine radio silence is lifted! Lies. Lies. Lies! ‘Here’s what we know—now!—that really happened. The Iranians knew the strikes were coming and they were ready. Not a single US cruise missile or bomber got through. Tehran obviously has this Russian S-400 or S-500 system and it obviously works. They also have, according to new reports we’ve been able to verify, advanced ultra-high-velocity sea-skimming missiles. That’s what sank the Reagan along with three support ships. ‘Our Navy is so weak, so unprepared that they can’t even recover the very few survivors. The Iranians, to their great credit, have been picking up our wounded, treating them, and offering to return them as soon as possible. They, it seems, have Allah’s grace; we’ve lost it. ‘Within an hour of the Battle of the Arabian Sea, China moved against Taiwan, their first step being to sweep the US Pacific Fleet aside. That’s when we lost the Roosevelt and the Nimitz and other support ships, lost them to even more advanced weaponry and tactics. That’s when we lost most of our island-based assets in the South China Sea and the Philippine Sea. China, by the way, is not interested in recovering any of our MIAs. Also, by the way, there is practically nothing we can do about any of this. ‘That’s when, that’s how we lost an estimated thirty-thousand casualties in one hour. That’s why Vladimir Putin sternly reminded Washington of the new Russian defense alliances with Beijing and Tehran. That’s when the failed, satanic, blood-thirsty fools in the White House started lying. That’s how we know this paper tiger has no teeth. Just maybe, maternity flight suits and transgender sex change operations weren’t the right priority. Well, regardless of how we look at it, America’s imperial age just ended.’
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 Where’s the envoy when we need him? Warren Zevon’s 1982 song, “The Envoy”, was a rock n’ roll telling of US Special Envoy Philip Habib’s hectic diplomacy efforts, particularly those in West Asia. I always liked the song, the way I liked almost all of Zevon’s work, may he rest in peace. His album of the same name was not a commercial success. Habib’s toil was more productive, at least temporarily. Of course, his missions in Lebanon and elsewhere somewhat represented attempts to undo some of the US’s nefarious actions in the region. Some things never change, but, anymore, it looks like Washington simply causes havoc wherever it goes, or else heavily supports and defends the misdeeds of others. My guess is that it looks that way because it is that way. Just as it no longer has any real leaders, the US no longer employs any real diplomats. Some sinecure moron babbling, “We are the United States. We will always support Raytheon’s right to profit, er, *cough, cough*, Israel’s right to defend itself,” doesn’t cut it. Today, the mantra of DC is, “do what we (or Israel) say, or else be bombed, sanctioned, or overthrown.” This approach kills, maims, and inconveniences millions worldwide, but, in the end, it is counterproductive. The only nation Washington is defeating is America. All other efforts are failing miserably and catastrophically. The CIA’s latest coup attempt in Caracas, Juan Guaidó 2.0, went down in flames. Everyone with eyes sees Washington’s looming humiliation by Russia. No one with a brain thinks Washington can fight, let alone beat China. The Secret Service can’t protect political candidates in the US. US vassal France can’t run the Olympics without full satanism breaking out. US vassal England can’t host a Taylor Swift party for girls without a merry old bout of “freedom stabbings”. They’re losing on all fronts. And yet onwards they march towards armageddon. The pathetic, cancerous US Congress just enthusiastically hosted Bibi Satanyahu, a known war criminal and genocidal sociopath. Bibi’s goons can’t beat Hamas in Gaza, and yet they chomp at the bit for more war—seemingly with everyone. Their next targets are, as always, Hezbollah and Iran, both of which are radically stronger than the Hamas brigades currently defeating the Zionists. Reality and caution tossed to the wind, this week, it’s been hammer down for insane, wanton destruction on those impossible fronts. On July 27, 2024, a missile or missile fragments struck a children’s soccer game in Majdal Shams, in what the Zionists claim is their occupied Golan Heights. Many children were killed and wounded. The Zionists immediately blamed Hezbollah and instantly asserted the weapon used was a Falaq-1 rocket. There were several problems with the story, beginning with the lack of any physical proof a Falaq was used. Majdal Shams takes its name from Aramaic, meaning, the “tower of the sun”. In that regard, in a Tolkienesque sense, it is titularly akin to Minas Anor, aka, Minas Tirith. This horrible episode is reminiscent of the Morgul Lord paying the city a visit. Majdal Shams is in Syria, as recognized by the people of the almost entirely Druze city, Damascus, and the rest of the civilized world. The only parties who consider it part of “Israel” are Bibi, Kamala Biden, Donald Trump, and maybe Uncle Screwtape. As for the strike, when Hezbollah launches a military attack, they generally boast about it. They do not target civilians, especially Arabs of any kind. When they make a mistake, they admit and apologize for it. In this case, they issued and maintained an adamant denial of involvement. It is their suggestion, backed by many others, that what landed and caused casualties was an interceptor missile from the Zionists’ Iron Dome AD system. It is possible an Iron Dome missile struck a projectile over the city, raining debris down on the victims. In that event, or in the event of a malfunctioning interceptor, the Zionists evidently welcomed the outcome as a golden opportunity to advance their war schemes. It is also possible the interceptor, or a similar missile, was deliberately targeted at the city in an attempt to stage a false flag. Regardless, the IGF (“Israeli” Genocide Force) ran with the opportunity. On July 30th, in a move Russia’s Foreign Ministry deemed a “gross violation of international law,” Bibi’s thugs launched a missile strike on Beirut. Their alleged target was Fouad Shukr (Shokor), military advisor to Hezbollah’s Hassan Nasrallah. Shukr previously found fame and honor by helping defeat and run imperial Yankee Marines out of Beirut in 1983. In addition to killing Shukr, in keeping with their traditions and usual tactics, the IGF did substantial damage to a residential apartment building and a hospital, killing and wounding scores of civilians in the process. (Word has it the IGF was disappointed that no Mosques, Churches, schools, refugee camps, or journalists were in the immediate vicinity of the attack.) Sometime between or around this atrocity and the IGF’s next barbarity, the US empire towed its new diplomatic line by murdering a number of Iraqis who had the audacity to oppose the US occupation of their country, a sentiment unanimously shared by Iraq’s government. The IGF, taking an uncharacteristic break from sodomizing Palestinian prisoners to death, next struck Tehran. Dr. Masoud Pezeshkian had just been sworn in as Iran’s new president. At his inauguration ceremony, he said, “You cannot call yourself a man and remain silent in the face of all the crimes of the Zionists.” Hamas political bureau leader Ismail Haniyeh, never one to remain silent in the face of injustice, was present for the celebration. That night, he and a bodyguard went to sleep at what might amount to a retirement home for war veterans in the suburbs of Tehran. They never woke up, both being murdered in their sleep by an IGF missile strike. Hamas, Hezbollah, Iran, and the entire Axis of Resistance will not stay silent for long. Tehran notified the UN that in response to such aggression, they are preparing to launch a “Special Military Operation” against their enemies. (President Putin should have trademarked that phrase.) Iran's Supreme Leader, Grand Ayatollah Khamenei, ordered Iran’s military to prepare a strong and fitting response to the Zionist entity for Haniyeh’s murder and the violation of Iranian sovereignty. As of my drafting, no action has been taken. Considering Iran’s 2020 retaliation against the US for murdering General Qasem Soleimani and its retaliation against the Zionists this year, one wonders what the Iranians will do now that their capital has been directly attacked. One also might wonder if Bibi and his Myrmidons in DC have any intelligence whatsoever in their evil little heads. Their lust for death and destruction may be about to push West Asia, maybe the greater world into a martial nightmare. Being utterly evil, that could be their plan. Maybe it would have been too much for any single envoy to sort out, settle down, or ameliorate. Humanity’s best hope probably comes down to multipolar civilizational diplomacy, holistic actions to restore dignity to life. Some of that was on display in Russia lately. On July 28, 2024, Sevastopol hosted a joyous celebration of the true founding of Russia, the 988 AD Christian Baptism of the people and their great land. The future of genuine Western history and tradition now resides in the Third Rome, along with all of Russia’s accumulated Eurasian grandeur and goodwill towards mankind. What a shame Zevon didn’t live to write a song about that! Deo vindice! |
